Last.Damn.Call

I read something recently, and of course I have slept since then and cannot recall where I placed the notebook, scrap of paper, random sticky note, napkin, whatever it was that I wrote the thought on…It is clearly being held captive in a smart hiding place and will turn up at some random time in the future. Oh well. I kinda sorta remember what it said.

Notice how your car’s GPS or navigation system doesn’t say, “Stop! Turn around! You missed the turn, dummy!” Instead, it says…rerouting. Right?

Why don’t we try to see our whole life like this? We all know our lives don’t run on some linear, straight, clearly marked, well-lit path all the time. So sometimes we gotta reroute. No panic. No slamming on the breaks of life and stopping the whole world from spinning until we find our sense of direction. We have to roll with it sometimes. Control freaks everywhere are cringing right now. Lucky for me, I am more like a fart in the wind. I like to have some sort of direction or destination but don’t mind getting carried away at times.

If you live in the real world, you most likely have some things in life that are not in your control. Perhaps you learn on your drive to work that there’s a detour you have to navigate around. Maybe you pull up to drop your kiddo off at daycare and realize you forgot they closed for the day due to staff needing to take a mental health day (hey, it happens and could be possible related to your wild child:) Ever planned an outdoor event and suddenly, KABOOM! a storm comes plowing down on you?

In all those situations, your life’s GPS doesn’t say, “Well, just sit here and hope the situation changes. Be stubborn. The rain will stop. Some child care worker will magically show up to take your toddler off your hands. Maybe the construction crew will reopen the lanes just for you.” Not happening, sister. You’ve just been rerouted. Against your will. Without your permission.

The power to improvise and compromise is a hell of a tool set to have in your back pocket. We all own these little gifts, but we have to be willing to use them when we need to. And it gets a little easier the more you put them to use.

The compromise/improvise technique is what this whole thought process consists of. Maybe you don’t like taking the interstate, but that’s the way you are going to have to reroute to make it to work on time. Big girl pants time! Slip ’em on and tell yourself thousands of morons take this interstate every day and LIVE TO TELL, so you can do the same. You literally took a new route.

You really don’t want to work with this parent, coworker, human of whatever nature…on a project. Well, be an asshat and refuse to play nice and look like the kid trying to pick the best players for their dodgeball team back in the day. Or smile and grit your teeth and think, “Hell maybe they don’t like me either. Maybe we are both in misery!” Just get it done and move on. Attitude rerouted. Even if only temporarily.

Learn to “Macgyver” some stuff. If you don’t get that reference, then my Granny is currently rolling over in her grave. Remember, he could escape handcuffs with a paper clip and ballpoint pen? Diffuse a bomb with a plastic fork and some bubble gum? Sometimes, you gotta channel that inner mulleted Macgyver and make things work. Granny’s mind was always blown with the traps he could escape and the plans he could hash out (I assumed she knew it wasn’t real, but who cares? She loved it regardless!)

Sometimes the reroute literally looks like a reroute. Running into someone who makes your skin crawl in good old Wal-Mart?…reroute immediately. There is no harm in that. You simply chose another path (aisle) with less turd heads in it (possibly…it is Wal-Mart and all…may the odds be in your favor). But you get the point.

Some reroutes are tougher. Examining relationships and deciding if they need some work or maybe it’s time to call it quits. Navigating work obstacles. Don’t pull an old drunken Lindsey and just quit. Rerouting may mean voicing your opinion or dissatisfaction with something. Doesn’t necessarily mean a draw bridge between what you currently have and what you really want will magically appear…but at least give it a try before you go jumping off into the murky (sometimes shark filled) waters of unemployment.

Mastering the art of the reroute takes some practice. Some undoing of that one track way of thinking. Learn to be flexible. Get creative. Don’t just be a quitter. Quitting every time an obstacle poses an inconvenience leads to zero growth. And zero growth means you get stuck. And no one likes being stuck. If MacGyver can make a Rocket Launcher/Bazooka from an old car muffler and some stuffing from a couch cushion, surely you can learn some rerouting life hacks to solve some of your own life’s sticky situations.