Last.Damn.Call

Get comfortable with being uncomfortable. Someone said this to me when I began working as a nurse. For those of you who have never had to wipe another adult’s rear end, well, congrats. But as time goes on, in the world of a nurse, you begin to focus on the task at hand. If you’ve seen one butt, you’ve seen them all. You take care of business and move on to the next task. Same with people vomiting, cursing you, bleeding, whatever. You focus on the task and try to remove any personal feelings, preconceived notions or gag reflexes.

Then, it was said to me again when I went to rehab. Get comfortable with being uncomfortable. Talking about things you’d rather not. Doing things (making your bed, exercising, reading) you’d rather not. Being around people you’d rather not. Sleeping in a room with a stranger. Showering and taking care of your business in a shared, non-private bathroom (there was a door, just no locks). Basically, living with criminals and addicts and trying to sleep, knowing that you are quite possibly in the most uncomfortable place on the planet.

When someone abuses a substance, they are trying to get comfortable in their own skin. And a substance makes you feel like you are temporarily fitting into the world around you. There’s this misconception about drugs and alcohol. When I was young, I had this image of people hiding in alleys and shadows and saying, “Come here, kid. Try this.” In reality, those people weren’t hiding in the shadows with bad intentions. They were my friends. My coworkers. My fellow classmates. It was never a matter of peer pressure (for me) as it was suggested in “Just Say No” campaigns and such in school. I always had this idea that drugs and alcohol would be presented to me by some sketchy old dude hanging out by the trash cans behind a gas station.

Addiction and alcoholism are an escape. A temporary one. A dangerous one. But it’s an escape, nonetheless.

I think the idea of getting comfortable with being uncomfortable starts at a young age. For example, as a teenager, if all your friends are sneaking drinks and cigarettes, and you simply aren’t interested…you need to be confident in standing your ground and simply saying no. Sounds simple to me. But not really. Not when you are young. I guess, for some people, not even when you are an adult, either.

What does getting comfortable with being uncomfortable look like in your life? Talking to your kids about dating? Talking to your spouse about your wishes if something unexpected were to happen to you? Discussing religion with someone who is a non-believer? Standing up for yourself or someone else who is being ridiculed or bullied?

I could go on and on about the things we need to get comfortable with doing or saying. Standing up for your beliefs. Admitting when you are wrong. Apologizing when necessary. Being kind even when you could choose not to be. Forgiving someone even when they may seem undeserving.

Control. That is one thing I can absolutely say is something I need to get comfortable with knowing is not solely on me. Not as a person with a strong faith in God. I cannot control people, places, things, situations. I can, to some extent, control my reactions to these things. But I am reminded everyday how I am unable to control so many things.

This is not a New Year’s resolution or anything of that nature. It’s just something I have been thinking about for a long time now. As a Christian, I have got to learn to trust in God’s will and quit trying to pretend I have control over things I do not. Sounds kind of simple and obvious…but I cannot imagine I am the only person who struggles with this. I have to get comfortable with knowing I am not in charge. I guess that’s my next step in getting comfortable with being uncomfortable. In this new year and years to come, I hope we all learn to “Let go and Let God” more often than not.

“You don’t have to have it all figured out—just take the next faithful step.”
Proverbs 3:5-6 “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.”