Last.Damn.Call

Ok, I am a bit of a nerd and get overly excited when I learn an explanation for something that I always thought was just something I noticed or thought about. When I find out that I am not alone in some of my crazy thought processes, I feel…well, less crazy.

The frequency illusion. I had never heard of this, but wow–I am glad I spent some time tonight ignoring laundry and cleaning to read up on it (Learning is always my go to when ignoring chores–Don’t tell anyone in my house:)

The frequency illusion–have you ever noticed that when you hear or see something “new” such as a certain type of car…you begin to see it everywhere? Coincidence, right? Maybe not. Never heard of a type of cereal or brand and suddenly you notice it in every store? Marketing, right? Somewhat. But this frequency illusion thing is really kinda cool if you are even somewhat of a nerd like me.

Our minds are designed to identify patterns in our environment. When we experience or learn something new, then suddenly we begin to notice it everywhere—even if it has been there all along. It allows us to observe and recognize patterns we otherwise would have ignored.

This. Explains. So. Much.

When you learn something new, your mind begins to focus on that something (usually unknowingly). Think about anytime you have taken up a new hobby or watched a movie with a new actress. You suddenly see (NOTICE) more advertisements about golf or pickleball or shows featuring your new favorite actor.

*This is also known as the Baader-Meinhof Phenomenon, but let’s keep it simple and call it The Frequency Illusion.

Without boring you to death, let me point out two things that are happening within this phenomenon:

1. Selective Attention: Your brain learns something new and makes that info a priority, basically pushing that info to the forefront of your mind.
   • Makes sense to me. Ever feel like you become obsessed with a new idea or product once you’ve learned about it? I know I have. That time I had to have an Insta-pot because it was all the rage and everyone seemed to love theirs. Mine is still collecting dust in the basement having not been used once single time since I had to have it approximately 5 years ago.
   • Once you learn about counting calories or how much sodium is in certain foods, you begin looking at all the food labels and even watching others at the dinner table, silently judging their over usage of salt.
2. Confirmation Bias: Okay, this is where things get sticky for me. Because in all honesty, this can be used for both good and evil. This is where you learn something new, and then you seek validation for this new belief, idea, whatever. So, basically, you are handpicking what information best fits into your belief or idea.
   • An example would be something like assuming all women are bad drivers. So, when a woman rear-ends you, you have proven your theory.
   • Researching whether cats or dogs make better pets (and you happen to be a dog lover), you will most likely seek information that portrays cats in a negative light.
   • As a Christian, I find and identify ways that God is working in my life. Someone seeking to prove me wrong may see these things as pure coincidence or the result of hard work, resilience, etc. and not related to faith.

This frequency illusion helps create how we perceive ourselves and our situations and relationships.

• Focus on problems, you’ll find more problems.
• Focus on solutions, you’ll find more solutions.
• Focus on complaining, you’ll find more things to complain about.
• Focus on gratitude, you’ll find more things to be grateful for.
• Focus on obstacles, you’ll find more obstacles.
• Focus on opportunities, you’ll find more opportunities.

See how this can play to your advantage if utilized wisely? Basically, it boils down to the whole “glass half-empty or half-full” idea. Do you choose to see the positives or negatives in life?

If I am being honest with myself, which is a somewhat annoying trait I have acquired through sobriety, I know I can absolutely shift either way. Whichever way I find “useful” in whatever the situation at hand may be. If I anticipate that rude person that I often run into at Wal-Mart being just that…rude…are they really? Or am I looking for them to prove me right? That they are a real pain in the crotch to everyone they come in contact with. Or am I seeking validation and being somewhat nit-picky?

It sounds ridiculous, but I find myself at times, coaching myself into a good mood. In the movie, “What About Bob?” the main character starts his day off by obsessively repeating, “I feel good. I feel great. I feel wonderful.” I don’t go to that extent, but I do find myself praying on the way to work or really anywhere that I might encounter other humans. Things like, “Let me think before I speak. Slow my reaction times. Be kind. Use words that are helpful. Know when to shut the hell up.”

As always, my prayers probably don’t sound like yours. God and I have been through some real tough crap together, so I am comfortable speaking to Him in my own language. You do you. I won’t judge. My guess is He won’t either. Remember to look for the good, and you will probably see more of it. Put out some positivity into the world and get some back in return.